


Halloween at Privet Drive

by Severuslily169



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Dursley Bashing, Gen, Halloween, Pranks, Revenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-31
Updated: 2016-08-31
Packaged: 2018-08-12 03:46:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7919299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Severuslily169/pseuds/Severuslily169
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Dursleys have an... interesting... Halloween while Dudley is out trick-or-treating!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Halloween at Privet Drive

**Author's Note:**

> Hello lovely readers! This story is in response to a Halloween prompt last year, as quoted below. 
> 
> Prompt: Character A and Character B are at home/other familiar location while Character C is off trick or treating/taking children trick or treating - while gone character A and B get scared and somehow manage to lock themselves in a closet/elevator/other small room.
> 
> Please do write your own responses to the challenge!

Mr and Mrs Dursley of Number Four Privet Drive were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. They didn't hold with things supernatural, and certainly did not approve of the notion of dressing up as magical beings for a night as strange as Halloween.

However, the Dursleys did have a son, possibly the only person other than themselves that they loved. Dudley Dursley was now 35 years old, and it had been many years since he had come to the realisation that his parents were not necessarily right. So it was that on this chilly Halloween night, the Dursleys were sitting alone at home while their son was out trick-or-treating.

Mr and Mrs Dursley had not aged well. Mr Dursley had lost a great deal of weight during his year on the run, and despite the passing of the years had never lost the haggard expression that he developed during that time. With Harry no longer living at Privet Drive, his wife had turned her nagging towards Vernon, and even in retirement his days were filled with work. His hair had whitened, and his once bushy moustache was a shadow of its former self. He walked now with a stooped back, and Dudley's old Smeltings cane was now used as a walking stick.

Mrs Dursley in contrast had ballooned out in the last few decades. Ever since Dudley had become serious about watching his diet, she had found that there was always far more food available than was needed. As a result, while her husband slowly wasted away, Petunia had developed a far more rotund figure. Although she felt ashamed of her loss of figure, she never did conquer the habit of cooking far more than necessary for a family of three.

One thing that had not changed was Mrs Dursley's compulsion to keep the house sparkling clean. Growing bored of watching television with her husband, she decided to fetch some supplies from the cupboard and clean the kitchen one more time. She waddled out of the living room, and a few minutes later a muffled shout was heard from the corridor outside.

Mr Dursley hurried out to investigate, and saw his wife collapsed on the floor, with the upper half of her body lying inside the cupboard under the stairs.

'Petunia dear?' he called, 'What's the matter?'

Walking closer, it soon became clear that Petunia had fallen down out of fright. The reason for her shock? The inside of the cupboard had a message written in glowing green paint, spelling out "I KNOW WHAT YOU DID IN HERE – BEWARE!"

"Now, now," he said with a nervous chuckle, "I'm sure it's just Dudders' Halloween prank. Just a harmless bit of fun. Up you get my dear..."

"I'm STUCK!" was the shrill retort, "Help me up you fool!"

Vernon did not appreciate being called a fool; however he knew that if he didn't help her he would never hear the end of it. So he heaved a sigh and set about trying to haul her body back up. Unsurprisingly, her bulk proved too much for him and his efforts only resulted in him falling down to join her. Not only this, but the momentum of his fall caused both of them to fall further into the cupboard, upon which the door to the cupboard slammed shut behind them!

 

==============================

 

It was pitch black inside the cupboard. Petunia was doubled up on the floor, her ample stomach being pushed into her face by her bent legs. Vernon was almost upside down above her, his head close to hers and his legs dangling in the air. Neither of them were pleased, to say the least. For many long moments, there was silence except for the sound of their heavy breathing.

It wasn't long before the panic set in, and Petunia began flailing around and trying to kick down the door. She was, of course, unsuccessful, and the only thing that she achieved was to throw her husband around and to bruise her heels. Vernon meanwhile had been thrown into the air, colliding hard with one of the shelves. He bellowed at his wife to cease thrashing about at once, since it was not achieving anything.

As Mrs Dursley lay there, for once being still and quiet, Vernon tried to think of a way out of this situation. An idea struck him, and he reached out with his leg for the door handle, attempting to hook a foot around it and open the door. However, although his foot did latch onto the handle, he found that his best efforts were not able to pull the lever down. He also realised that once hooked, he was unable to untangle his legs from the door handle, and had no choice but to remain bent in this awkward position.

 

==============================

 

It was over an hour later before things changed.

All of the Dursleys' attempts to escape had been disastrous failures, and they had quickly become very uncomfortable. Petunia was being suffocated by her own bunched-up mass, while Vernon was feeling distinctly lightheaded from the reversal of gravity. Their efforts to escape had dislodged many of the items stored in the cupboard, and small toy soldiers littered the ground, digging painfully into Petunia's buttocks. The vacuum cleaner had fallen from the corner, luckily missing their heads, but unfortunately had somehow wrapped itself around Vernon's neck. He could also have sworn that the machine was switched on despite the fact that it wasn't plugged in, as he could hear a rumbling noise next to him.

The pair of them had despaired of finding their way out, and were merely praying for Dudley's speedy return.

But ultimately, their liberation was not through Dudley's hands. After an interminable wait, the cupboard door swung open to reveal two raven haired boys smirking down at the Dursleys. One of these boys could not have been older than 11, warm brown eyes alight with mischief. The other appeared to be in his early thirties, his emerald green eyes glinting beneath a faded lightning scar.

"Dursleys!" cried their nephew, "I hope you enjoyed your stay in my cupboard. The paint was a nice touch, don't you think? Although it was James' idea to animate the vacuum, what did you think of being choked? It was a wonderful joke, yes?"

He beamed down at the Dursleys, although the smile didn't quite reach his eyes.

"I hope you learned a valuable lesson from this experience. I'm sure you didn't have fun being locked in there – did you ever stop to think that your nephew wouldn't enjoy it either? At least I didn't leave you in overnight – though aunty dearest, you seem to have wet yourself anyway! Well I'll fix everything up for you before Dudley gets here, so no harm done isn't that right?"

With a wave of his wand, the Dursleys found themselves levitated out of the cupboard, and the evidence of Petunia's accident disappeared with a word. The emerald eyed man also vanished the paint inside the cupboard and restored the items back to their original positions.

With a cheery wave, the two wizards wished the Dursleys a happy Halloween, and then vanished from Privet Drive.

 

==============================

 

The Dursleys were shaken by the experience. But did they learn from it? It is sad but true, but they never understood the lesson. The Halloween prank did nothing but reinforce their belief that magic was unnatural and frightening, and that their nephew was an ungrateful freak. Such was their trauma from this night, that when Dudley got married to a lovely young woman named Cho Chang the following summer, they refused to attend his magical wedding for fear of running into the Potters. Their relationship with their son  
never recovered from this refusal, and ten years later the Dursley parents died lonely and perfectly normal deaths.

 

==============================

 

Many miles away, two black haired wizards appeared outside the gates of Hogwarts.

The features of the older man blurred and melted into a much younger face, only a few months past 17. The black hair faded to brown, and the green eyes turned to grey. Teddy Lupin turned to his comrade with a grin, celebrating a prank well done. He and James Potter walked smiling into the castle, ready to avail themselves of the delicious Halloween feast.

 

==============================

 

Meanwhile in Godric's Hollow, Harry Potter was making his annual visit with his wife and remaining children. At a quiet cemetery, they laid down flowers at the gravesides and remembered those that were buried below.

Harry had long since moved past the memories of his childhood, and had built a happy life for himself in the wizarding world. He remained blissfully unaware of the goings-on at Number Four Privet Drive, and Teddy and James truly did pull off the perfect prank that night.


End file.
